algebraic thirst

if we flip a fair coin
dear teacher loved to say
enough times and tally
and of course hope and pray
we will get fifty heads
and fifty tails percent
at least for data
of pure descent

it seems only decent
vox populi would spout
this fifty fifty deal
is what the game’s all about
when we roll a pair of dice
we need not invoke poisson
add the sum of dots or spots
the bell curve peaks at seven

for them it all seemed so clear
every jot precise tittle discrete
they’d stratified their spectrum
no wiggle room model complete
so when some sad fool suggested
that every now and then again
a fair coin should land on its edge
aghast they cried he’s lost his venn

i have no problem with heads or tails
but fair is fair for dice and coins
please glean i mean not to perplex
every once in a while he said
a coin on its edge a die on a vertex
this would be fairer than pure tail and head

highly improbable one cried
another wailed insignificant
one diagnosed esotropia
demanded mr. edge recant
after a week the prof chimed in
i flipped and flipped all night
and got an edge all right
point zero one percent

so mr. edge may have a point
it’s not just hypothetical
a point is massless spaceless entity
but it’s downright heretical
why argue tiny ppm
or even mention ppb
it’s a waste of precious nonsense
things we cannot possibly see

thus he did not bother them
with other talk beyond the edge
of strange and charmed nor quantum spin
and other states of coiny matterage
of paired dee-twenties to die for
neatly manifolded tesseracts
nonuniform topology
or anything they can’t protract

while others would be busy rapping
mr. edge would be hacking mapping
topology of zork and advent
spelunking or a subbasement
calculating pressure in the boiler
wouldn’t use a compass to hunt a wumpus
nor a ruler to find basic euler
just sign cose zed ein eee eye pie

polythis and thatometry
plethoric paths of all the maths
spheric cylindric proportionality
archimedes hexagonal baths
late night rendezvous with trigons
let tesseled polygons be bygones
dimensional compactile fractal
rendering reality tactile

the dance of protein conformations
encoiled coding lattice serpentine
encoding quits of informations
generates functions labyrinthine
mathematics pervades the chaos
from condensed core to gamma burst
aligned by gravitational floss
this algebra inspires great thirst

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About Brad Werner

Technical Evangelist
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